My Ronni Chasen Dream

I had a very intense dream about Ronni Chasen coming at me with a big silver gun. She accused me of sleeping with her lover and shot to kill me but the bullets burst into glass and shattered all around me like diamonds. It was a beautiful nightmare.

It started with me being in the body of another woman -- I looked eastern Indian with a long nose and wide eyes -- I spent a large part of the dream staring back at myself in a mirror as I applied make-up. In a room next to mine a couple was arguing and throwing things at each other. I was in a fancy apartment/condo building and when I went out of my flat to investigate the fight, I heard the couple whispering loudly at each other to shut-up, as if they were trying to calm down so they wouldn't attract the neighbor's attention.

The next thing that happened was I left the building in the middle of the night. I was dressed in an elegant grey coat and high heels and crossed a busy city street to arrive at a stylish all-nighter cafe. I sat behind a man who looked a little like Niel Patrick Harris. We were in a secret love affair with each other. I didn't know he was involved with Ronni Chasen until she showed up and made a big physical display of their love. When Ronni left to "powder her nose" in the ladies room, the NPH-look-a-like turned to me and asked to meet me at a nearby hotel. So I paid my check and left.
Once outside the cafe I was chased down by a black limo. Inside the limo was Robert Loggia playing the role of a jealous Mob boss who demanded I get in the vechile with him. "Come on, lovely!" He cried, but I ran away down a narrow alley where the limo couldn't follow. I soon came to a hotel surrounded by tall palm trees and lit by red lights. It looked like a cheap hotel you'd see in the B-movies set in southern California. I quickly ducked into the closest open room.
The room inside was decorated in vermillion brocades and silks. I laid in bed with a dark-haired man with an incredibly tiny penis. I pulled on it to wake him and he cried out in pain. The door to the room opened and in walked the NPH-look-a-like. "They've discovered us, we got to leave!" he said and proceeded to start to pack a big black plastic bag full of clothes. Before we could leave, bullets from an automatic machine gun exploded through the room, killing the men but leaving me still alive. I escaped through a tiny window in the bathroom and found myself at a city crossroads in broad daylight riding a half-horse/half-sheep.
The creature took me up into the air and then flew up to a magic/New Age store. I found myself in a new female body -- this one with red hair and I was dressed in a green silk gown. Rebekah was there and she carried a big green book -- it was a book that was part of a series of workbooks full of spellwork and so on -- and apparently it was written by me, Valentina. I felt self-conscious because I soon realized the entire store was filled with people wanting me to autograph these books. I told Rebekah she didn't need to ask me and I asked her to help me escape. She pointed to a hidden door and I took off.
I found myself back at the fancy condo, but this time it was early morning. The interior was a lot like the historic Bradbury Building but the Italian Neo-Renaissance architecture was all green marble. As I headed outside the front glass doors, I saw Ronni Chasen dressed in a virgin fox fur coat and she held out a large silver gun, pointed it at me, and fired. As the bullets flew and broke all the glass, she was screaming that "it's all your fault" and "this is for sleeping with HIM!" and my last memory was the bullets themselves changing to glass into diamonds. I woke up with a start almost believing I had died!
It really freaked me out.